Thursday, March 13, 2008

Is it Thursday already? Summer already?

Natalie told me I had to blog today so that my readers know I'm alive. Okay, I'm alive. And well.

I want to know why it feels like summer already, and why didn't we get winter this year? I'm not accepting global warming as an answer, either.

Since I'm in a curmudgeonly mood this afternoon let me just go ahead and make my annual pronouncement. (Usually only my immediate family get stuck hearing this, now with my vast blog audience...well, okay...family members, listen up)

I don't like summer.

I also don't like Daylight Saving Time, and if I could go back in time I would find Benjamin Franklin... No, wait, I would find the people who took his sarcastic, joking proposal of DST seriously, and I would slap them silly. Daylight Saving Time is an abomination from the pit of hell and it smells like smoke. I don't know if you've heard this, but it Makes People Grouchy. I have am proof.

Back to summer. I don't like being hot, nor do I like being sticky. Nor do I like being bitten by bugs, plagued by poison ivy, irritated by pollen, and slowly killed by ozone and particulate matter in our bad air. I do not like gardening, although I do like eating fresh fruits and vegetables from the garden. I do not like sunbathing, golfing, running around like an idiot in the heat, and all those other things people love to do in the summer time. The actual act of swimming I can enjoy, but all the accompanying fol de rol of driving or walking in the heat to a pool, wearing lycra, and getting chlorine on my skin makes it hardly worth thinking of.

My father-in-law told me once that the reason I hate summer is because I'm fat and fat people don't tolerate the heat well. He may have had a point about fat people in general, and I admit to being about as fat as a person can legally get, but let it be known that I have never liked summer. I have also never been what you would call scrawny or undernourished, at least not once I got past 5 years old. But I have been much more "normal" in size that I am now, and I did not like summer then. As a child I looked forward to being out of school, but that is different than liking summer.

I remember enjoying the heat one summer of my life. I was very anemic and freezing constantly. Tom would come home and want to know why I hadn't turned the air conditioner on and I would say things like, "But it's only 87 outside and it feels very pleasant in here." Once the cause of the anemia was taken care of and my hemoglobin levels got back to normal I lost that heat-tolerance advantage. It's my understanding that there are people out there who enjoy summer heat like that all the time. Interesting. Fortunately for me, none of them live in the same house with me!

To be honest, it is not hot here today. According to the digital thermometer on the wall near me, it is 69 degrees outside and 71 degrees in the house. It is also not too humid. So I really have no grounds for complaint today. BUT, I know it is coming. It won't be long at all till the weather people on TV start saying things like "Tomorrow's high should be in the mid-eighties, so just a lovely day out there...get out and enjoy it!"

I want to move to Vermont.

13 comments:

mandolinartist said...

Yes, I was going to say that while some of these things, (perhaps problems,) may be true for the general public, I think it has quite a bit to do with where we live... the humidity, allergies... etc etc... but I do love North Carolina!

mandolinartist said...

Oh yeah, and I am glad you are alive!

Jim said...

Skip Vermont - the taxes are absurdly high, and unless you've found some Scriptural support for same-sex "unions," you'll have trouble fitting in. (That isn't what they're always trying to impose on Wal-Mart, is it?)

South Dakota or Minnesota should do the trick nicely... :) Maybe even Montana. For extra credit, name the movie: "I would have liked to have seen Montana."

Shari said...

You might need to move. It's going to be 28*F tomorrow here. I've been here 7 winters and I don't know how many more I can make it through. I thinking about moving down south - haven't talked about it with my husband yet though.

My latest blog post is about Evangelism ideas at Easter. I'm telling everyone about it, because I think that Easter and Christmas are awesome times of the year to spread the word about Jesus.

Beth said...

"The Hunt For Red October", but I don't get the extra credit because I had to Google it. Not a movie I've seen.

Vermont taxes don't seem to be any higher than NC taxes, other than for cigarettes...guess I'd have to give up smoking. And if they want to try to force things on WalMart they are welcome to it, in my opinion.

mandolinartist said...

Do you smoke?

Beth said...

Only when I'm really, really mad. :)

mandolinartist said...

I have some relatives who smoke, sometimes when they are mad and sometimes when they are not! :) It is tobacco and RJR country I suppose...

Natalie said...

No, that's the steam coming out of your ears. :)

Walmart "fitting in"..."Yeah, you know that big box over there, in the nice tasteful colors? Yeah, that's right, the one with the big crowded parking lot in front of it. That's a Walmart! Would you believe it?!??"

The half-way redeeming point?...they have air-conditioning. *shrugs*

Jim said...

VT's real estate taxes would have the biggest impact on your family; expect at least a 200% increase over NC's for the same kind of house you currently enjoy. There aren't many opportunities to be frugal with regard to government's tendency to eat out your substance at gunpoint.

It does look like the substantially higher sales tax rates would be offset by the exemptions which cover more of the kinds of things you buy (groceries, meds, etc.).

Natalie said...

I didn't know we were actually moving to Vermont. Silly me. Do you have a house picked out for us, Uncle Jim?

Jim said...

Just a couple adults having a conversation about taxes in Vermont, Natalie. You toddle off to bed now, and see if that headache doesn't feel better in the morning.

Mrs. Darling said...

You know what? I hate summer too. Its only been about the last three years that I have even a slight likeness for the season. I live on Oregon where temps are mild and we dont even know what humidity is but I still am not fond of summer! We get temps in the 100's about 4 days out of the year and I hate those four days the most. I dont know how to swim. I dont like wearing shorts. I have major summer allergies. Lets just see summer is not fun for me!